Can A Dad Really Be A Mom?

Doing some comparative math in the weeks before Father’s Day, a recent study at Fordham University, United States, has calculated that the number of single-father families, around the world, has jumped up to 30-35 percent in the past decade. This declares that single dads are growing 6 percent a year-that's double the rate for single moms. And this means almost 15 percent of men are running a ‘dad-only household’! But, despite all the facts, a question that pops in the mind immediately is ‘can a dad really be a mom?’ No matter how much you love and care for your bundle of joy, rearing a child is a difficult task under any circumstance and for a man, without a partner, the stakes are even higher. You are not only supposed to show the firmness of a male but you also need to show the gentleness of a female. Single dads are supposed to raise kids like moms do, which actually turns the scene upside down, making both, the kid as well as the dad very miserable. Sure, moms have a way of raising kids, but dads do too. So as a single father, try staying natural and simply remember to raise them as a ‘man’ would. To guide you better to handle the challenges, Guardian Health Chronicle comes to your rescue. Start reading!

Tips To Nurture a Confident Child Adults and children do better when single parenthood is perceived as a viable option and not as a pathological situation. Follow the given tips to start with a positive attitude:

1. Talk a lot - You need to be open and completely honest with your children. Make them feel comfortable about asking your questions. Let them know its okay for them to wonder, and to ask questions. Most of all let them know that none of the events that happened is their fault. We all know children jump to that conclusion. It’s important to show them love and understanding during this time.

2 . Keep your promises - Try recalling what it’s like to be a kid. When you asked your parents for something, and they didn't follow through, you kept grudges. During this delicate point in a confusing child's life, it’s no time for them to turn against you. Let them know you are always there for them, and they can trust you. Even if it is something small, your kids remember so better to keep your promises.

3. Adjust to waking up earlier - Most school buses come around 7:15 on average. Make sure you are up and ready before your children are. Have some breakfast on the table, and let them know that they aren't alone. Wake them up for school, pack their lunch and etc. They depend on you now, even for the small things.

4. Set a chore chart - Adjusting to doing new things around the house can be a hassle. On top of working, and taking care of your kids, now there's a whole house and clothes to take care of. Don't let all of these things pile up. Make a planner or chart. Plan out each day, and what you'll be doing. For example, you could do laundry every Monday and Wednesday, grocery shopping every Tuesday and Friday and etc.

5. Accept help - Most likely, there will be people to offer their help. You can’t do it all! Swallow your pride and take the gracious offer. They wouldn't offer if they didn't want too. Take it!

6. Create few strict routine structures such as scheduled meals and bedtimes — this helps your child know what to expect.

7. Set reasonable limits. Explain house rules and expectations to your child — such as speaking respectfully and picking up after yourself — and be careful to enforce them. Work with the other caregivers in your child's life to ensure you're providing consistent discipline. Consider re-evaluating certain limits, such as your child's computer time or curfew, when he or she demonstrates the ability to accept more responsibility.

8. Don't feel guilty. At time you may feel low about the situation but under any circumstances don't blame yourself or spoil your child to try to make up for being a single parent.

9. Set aside time each day to play, to read or simply sit with your child.

10. Show your love. Remember to praise your child. Give him or her unconditional love and support.

11. Most important, never miss to take care of yourself. Include physical activity in your daily routine, eat a healthy diet and get plenty of sleep. Arrange time to do activities you enjoy alone or with close friends. You need not lost your personal self as it would get frustrating in long run.

12. Stay positive. Your mood and attitude can affect your child. It's OK to be honest with your child if you're having a difficult time, but remind him or her that things will get better. Try to keep your sense of humor when dealing with everyday challenges.


Remember, if you're too tired or distracted to be emotionally supportive or you can’t consistently discipline your child, behavioural problems might arise in your kid. So go slow and keep calm!

Now, think no more just try these great tips to make things a little easier and enjoy being a great ‘dad’.

 By Priya Singh

How to Foster Parent's Teacher Relationship

“Easier said than done,” you must be thinking! After all, there are teachers your child will love and teachers he may not. There are teachers you’ll like and dislike as well. In fact, there should be a self help book stating Teachers are from Saturn, Parents are from Jupiter to help navigate the difficult path of parent-teacher relationship. Priya Singh makes an attempt to provide some useful strategies on the subject. 

What Parents Should Do 

 Keep in touch with the school. Stay aware of what your children are learning, what their assignments are, and how they are doing. Make a point of visiting the school and talking with the teachers through parent/teacher conferences. If you can’t visit, schedule a telephone call to discuss your child’s progress. Remember that the teacher is on your side. Teachers truly care about your children and want them to be successful. “The child’s success is our success,” tells Kirti Mathur (M. Ed.) English Teacher, DPS, Indirapuram.

Create a problem-solving partnership, instead of confronting a teacher immediately with what’s wrong. If your child’s teacher contacts you about a problem or something that happened at school, understand that the teacher is trying to work with you to resolve any conflict that may be getting in the way of your child’s development. Do meet with the teacher to brainstorm and to find out ways to help your child, instead of starting the blame game,” recommends Dr Rohini Broota, Consultant Child Psychologist, Moolchand Medcity Hospital Delhi.

Try not to boast. Of course you think your child is brilliant, but bragging over his accomplishments may send a message to the teacher that you think he may not be good enough to teach your child. Always think before you speak as you don’t need to sell your child to the teacher, notes Singla, rather you have to trust that your teacher will come to know what’s important herself. Telling a teacher that your child loves to read will thrill the teacher. But challenging your teacher with statements like ‘he read 50 new books over the summer,’ may backfire.

 Think like a child! Offer praise, support and encouragement. Parents and families play an important role in influencing a child’s confidence and motivation to become a successful learner. Encourage them to complete assignments and introduce them to outside experiences that will enhance their self-confidence and broaden their interests.
Also, you must be interactive with your child to know more about his behaviour in school. Ask child about his class work and school environment. And if you get to know that the child’s relationship with his teacher is not good, you must listen to the child and contact the teacher.

What Teacher Should Do

Involve parents in classroom activities. Teachers can let child’s family know how they can be helpful and can ask for their assistance with specific activities. Parents can interact more with the teacher by participating in classroom materials, serving on a committee to select classroom equipment and materials, or by sharing information about their kids’ careers, tells Singla. At least quarterly activities of such kind can greatly help the child. The more involved parents are in what goes on in the classroom, the more likely they are to understand the teacher’s goals and practices.

Give parents a voice in decisions. Parents’ viewpoints should be considered in making decisions about their children’s schooling Foster good communication during parent- teacher conferences. During PTM’s create a comfortable environment in which parents’ feel free to share information, ask questions and make recommendations.

While these are no magic recipes that are easy to cook, but yes following these strategies you can help your child get close to the teacher and excited about learning (or at least get you through some tough spots along the way). Help kids plan their time, complete their homework, and make the most of school years.

So take action now else, it may happen that before you realize, your child will be graduate to college and the memories of school days will rest in your heart forever.